As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.

     Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.

     Most of the arguments to which I am a party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about.

     Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he's supposed to be doing at the moment.

     For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.

     I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine.

     A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.

     I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.

     I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.

     If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe, let him go back to where he came from.

     In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.